Should I come out? How will people react?
Most people come out because, sooner or later, they can’t stand hiding who they are anymore. They want their relationships to be stronger, richer, more fulfilling and authentic. Once we come out, most of us find that it feels far better to be open and honest than to conceal such an integral part of ourselves. We also come to recognize that our personal decision to live openly helps break down barriers and stereotypes that have kept others in the closet. And in doing so, we make it easier for others to follow our example.
While there are many benefits to coming out, there are also risks. As constructive as the decision is, the reaction of others can be difficult or impossible to predict. When you weigh the benefits and risks of being open about who you are, it’s important to remember that the person in charge of your coming out journey is you. You decide who to confide in, when to do it and how. You also decide when coming out just may not be right, necessary or advisable.
Keep in mind that there is no one right way or wrong way to come out or live openly. Choosing to come out or to be open does not mean you have to be out at all times or in all places – you decide how, where and when based on what’s right for you. Your sexual orientation and gender identity are important pieces of you, but they do not have to define you. Living openly doesn’t change all the many unique things that make you, you.
- See our Resource Guide to Coming Out for more information.